Tag Archive 'miracle'

Jul 09 2009

M.I.R.A.C.L.E. – Issue #19

My brother Norm has been living with a brain aneurysm for years – and I mean LIVING! Nine years ago he was wracked with an excruciating headache. The doctors discovered that it was from a leaking aneurysm, and rushed him into surgery. After a 7-hour brain surgery, they determined that his aneurysm was inoperable. When he realized that he could die any day, he chose to LIVE every day – he followed his bliss, buying a sailboat and sailing to the Caribbean where he is having wonderful adventures in paradise. He stopped thinking about the aneurysm and lived as if it was gone. A few weeks ago he had an MRI, which showed that the aneurysm has completely calcified and there is no longer a threat of it rupturing! He considers this a personal miracle.

What I see is that he had a powerful intention to live as if he were whole and healed. The seed of intention that is well tended and nourished can flower into coincidences, synchronicities and miracles that heal the body, boggle the mind, and lift the spirit. I’ve created an acronym for the word miracle:

            My Intention Radiates Apparently Coincidental Luminous Events

When these “coincidental” luminous events happen to me and the people in my life, it reminds me that there’s more going on than meets the eye, there is an unseen energy that responds to our deepest and most focused desires. Einstein said, “Coincidences are God’s way of remaining anonymous.” For me, they are God’s way of saying, “You are not alone.”

Prayer is another form of intention that reveals our interconnectedness with the powerful forces of the Universe. In my early twenties I was feeling deeply depressed and asked for a sign from God that life was worth living. Just then there was a sound of movement in the room. I looked in the direction of the sound and saw that a tall, thin candle in a wrought iron candle holder on the wall had fallen to one side, pointing to the calligraphed poster next to it that read: GET THY SHIT TOGETHER. I smiled to myself and thought, “Is that you God?” The next day as I was writing about it in my journal it happened again! It excited me and made me want to stick around, to live, play and explore in this magical energy field of life.

Another time, several years ago, I was having another “dark night of the soul”, feeling deep despair and praying for guidance. As I was crying and journaling about it, a card that was displayed on the bookshelf beside me fell to the floor. I picked it up and it had a beautiful flower on the cover with the words, “You are so loved.”

I love how, when we’re open to it, just the right words, experiences, and people that we need fall into our life. It is a wonderful synchronicity that my brother has recently shared his healing miracle with me; it inspires me to let go of thoughts of cancer (knowing that I have made all the healthy life changes I could) and continue to focus on seeing myself whole, healed, and connected to the miraculous forces of the Universe. That’s the image and feeling I want to cultivate, nourish and nurture – That’s the intention I want to radiate out into the Universe.

I believe that the deepest intention of our soul is to be vibrantly present, whole and alive. I have experienced that seeming adversities such as aneurysms, depression and cancer can be valuable and necessary stimulants in bringing about that intention, resulting in the miracle of our full participation and appreciation of life and living our wildest dreams.

Do you have an intention that is bringing forth miracles in your life? Is there adversity in your life that is serving as “miracle grow” to help you flower into more vibrant aliveness and living your dream?

In Love,

Jan Jacobsen

P.S. - Speaking of miracles – Several weeks ago, my cat Zeena was given a 15% chance of survival by the vet who examined her, saying her jaundice and liver failure was too far advanced. I am thrilled to report that Zeena is alive and licking! No longer yellow, she is in the “pink”, and is purring beside me as I write this. Through the miracle of prayers, (yours and mine), lots of love and affection, and hand feeding her (having her lick Fancy Feast off my fingers), she made it! Thank you for all your loving thoughts and good wishes.

 

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Jun 24 2009

Mirror-cle at the Grand Canyon – Issue #17

Tom and I spent last weekend at a family reunion with my mother’s side of the family at the Grand Canyon. There were 31 of us, many I had never met before, converging from all parts of the world. We traveled together in our own private rail car on a 2-hour train ride from Williams, Arizona to the Grand Canyon. At first I felt nervous and shy and apart from everyone. Eventually as I looked at them and saw familiar features, the same mouths, similar eyes looking back at me, I remembered that we are all a part of each other, and I began to relax and enjoy the journey.

My mother died 3 years ago but I could imagine her traveling with us, reveling in this family gathering. I was also aware of her within me when a singing cowboy moseyed onto our train car, and I began to sing along with him. When I was a child, my mother would do something like that, and I’d be so embarrassed. I also experienced my mother in me when some personas that we had in common, Miss Bossy Pants and Nervous Nell, showed up the day before on the 9-hour car drive with Tom to Arizona – and The Incredible Sulk was about to make an appearance later in the day. On my refrigerator I have a magnet with a picture of a woman from the 1950’s and she’s wearing a little kerchief, a pretty pink sweater, and red lipstick and the caption reads, “Despite years of personal development, she still turned into her mother.”

Yup, it’s true. What I’ve discovered is that everything I ever judged about my mother and everyone else in my family (and in my life) is in me. That’s the interesting thing about self-awareness; it’s like turning on a light in the attic and seeing all the cobwebs and creepy crawlies very clearly and seeing that they are mine. Everything I’ve been judging and projecting onto others is in me. Life is a mirror -  becoming aware of that is what I call a mirror-cle.

Despite my many years of personal growth, I still get stuck – I get carried away on a run-away train of thought, hijacked by my defensive reactions. The big difference now is that mindfulness, my compassionate witness, observes it all and sees how my stuckness originates within me. Standing above the Grand Canyon and observing the twists and turns below, is similar to mindfulness, observing the twists and turns of thoughts and feelings within. It’s pretty much a given that defenses will be activated occasionally, especially in times of stress.

When we arrived at the Grand Canyon I asked Tom to hold my purse, with my jacket draped over it, while I was getting my picture taken with my cousins. My sister Carol saw this and thought, “Isn’t that nice. He’s holding her purse and jacket for her.” Tom has what he calls a Mr. Wonderful persona. When I went to get my purse back from him, my jacket was gone. “Where’s my jacket?” I asked him. “What jacket?” he asked, oblivious to it’s having been draped over the purse. He had lost my jacket! Tom also has a self-acknowledged Mr. Blunderful persona, who, to his dismay, often follows close on the heels of Mr. Wonderful.

I could feel my adrenaline hornets start to swarm as I descended into an emotional ravine, and began turning into the Incredible Sulk. “He lost my favorite jacket!” As I stood at the edge of the Grand Canyon, looking out over the panoramic view, I could clearly see the overview of my inner descent. My internal witness took it all in – the buzzing adrenaline hornets, the huffy wet hen thoughts, the Incredible Sulk, the powerful pull of this physical/emotional hijacking; and in that moment I felt compassion and understanding for myself, for my mother, for all of us who get stuck in our defensive reactions. Like gravity, they are an extremely compelling force. From atop the Grand Canyon I viewed this all unfolding within me…then I took a deep breath, smiled, and took Tom’s hand as we walked along the edge of this vast overview, consciously making the choice to shift from my snitness to my witness. Now that’s a miracle! (p.s. The jacket eventually was found!)

When I feel apart from others, I am learning to remember that I am a part of them and they are a part of me – we are all connected, we are all on a journey together, at a family re-union, here to witness the grand overview, seeing how it all fits together, seeing how we all fit together, and discovering that life is one big mirror-cle.

I’ve written a poem about this:

REFLECTIONS OF ONE

What I think are enemies

are really just the many me’s

projected out identities

for me to see and love.

Some will shout obscenities,

some without amenities,

all seem to be them, not me,

yet all are mine to love.

Mirrors, mirrors all around, 

reflections of myself abound.

What most wants to be loved is found

in what I judge in you.

Loving is the alchemy

that transforms you and me to we,

the mirror-cle that helps me see,

that we are really One.


What is your life reflecting back to you? What is showing up to be faced and embraced? Are you ready for a mirror-cle? 

 In Love,

Jan Jacobsen

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