Tag Archive 'depression'

Nov 11 2009

A Magic, Time-Traveling Carpet Ride in Palm Springs – Issue #32

Last weekend I was in Palm Springs with my husband Tom. I’d been there one other time, forty years before, when I left my home in Mystic, Connecticut and was traveling with a friend to Hawaii and California. Back then I was searching for something very important…a reason to live. And I wasn’t finding it. As I walked in the dry heat of sunny downtown Palm Springs in present time, I kept thinking of that young girl who was there all those years ago, feeling so unhappy, so out of place in the world, convinced that she would always be alone in life.

I look at pictures of myself from that time — I was tanned from weeks in Hawaii, as trim as I’d ever been, with golden blonde hair down to my waist, a pretty girl. Yet on the inside I felt pretty empty. Now, 40 years and fifteen pounds later, I caught glimpses of myself in store windows — not so hot on the outside anymore, yet people I walked past were smiling at me. Then I realized, I had a smile on my face and people were responding to that. I was happy inside and it showed; I had discovered my inner beauty, I had created a happy life.

Quantum physics tells us that all time exists simultaneously. In downtown Palm Springs I sat on a bench in the shade and closed my eyes, and imagined reaching through time, aligning with my twenty-year-old self, doing a mind and heart meld with her, feeling her within me. I showed her what her life would become, telling her, “Hang in there Jan, your life will be so rich with love and learning, spirit and play, creativity and discovery — like the amazing discovery that you are creating it all! And…you will be married to a wonderful man! You are NOT destined to be alone forever.” All weekend I held her in the love and joy and reality of this present time, and told her something I heard recently, “Everything works out in the end. If it hasn’t worked out, then it’s not the end.” 

Just imagine that it’s true that we can align with our past and future selves in the realm of timelessness that weaves our whole life together, like threads in a magic time-traveling carpet — if you were to talk to yourself in the past during a difficult time, what would you say to that self, knowing what you know now? What encouragement and wisdom would you offer that self? If right now is one of those difficult times, imagine a future self, who has come through it all to a better place, sending you a message of love and encouragement. Open to receive that message — it is ALWAYS there to draw on. Just imagine that!

In Love,

Jan Jacobsen

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Jul 09 2009

M.I.R.A.C.L.E. – Issue #19

My brother Norm has been living with a brain aneurysm for years – and I mean LIVING! Nine years ago he was wracked with an excruciating headache. The doctors discovered that it was from a leaking aneurysm, and rushed him into surgery. After a 7-hour brain surgery, they determined that his aneurysm was inoperable. When he realized that he could die any day, he chose to LIVE every day – he followed his bliss, buying a sailboat and sailing to the Caribbean where he is having wonderful adventures in paradise. He stopped thinking about the aneurysm and lived as if it was gone. A few weeks ago he had an MRI, which showed that the aneurysm has completely calcified and there is no longer a threat of it rupturing! He considers this a personal miracle.

What I see is that he had a powerful intention to live as if he were whole and healed. The seed of intention that is well tended and nourished can flower into coincidences, synchronicities and miracles that heal the body, boggle the mind, and lift the spirit. I’ve created an acronym for the word miracle:

            My Intention Radiates Apparently Coincidental Luminous Events

When these “coincidental” luminous events happen to me and the people in my life, it reminds me that there’s more going on than meets the eye, there is an unseen energy that responds to our deepest and most focused desires. Einstein said, “Coincidences are God’s way of remaining anonymous.” For me, they are God’s way of saying, “You are not alone.”

Prayer is another form of intention that reveals our interconnectedness with the powerful forces of the Universe. In my early twenties I was feeling deeply depressed and asked for a sign from God that life was worth living. Just then there was a sound of movement in the room. I looked in the direction of the sound and saw that a tall, thin candle in a wrought iron candle holder on the wall had fallen to one side, pointing to the calligraphed poster next to it that read: GET THY SHIT TOGETHER. I smiled to myself and thought, “Is that you God?” The next day as I was writing about it in my journal it happened again! It excited me and made me want to stick around, to live, play and explore in this magical energy field of life.

Another time, several years ago, I was having another “dark night of the soul”, feeling deep despair and praying for guidance. As I was crying and journaling about it, a card that was displayed on the bookshelf beside me fell to the floor. I picked it up and it had a beautiful flower on the cover with the words, “You are so loved.”

I love how, when we’re open to it, just the right words, experiences, and people that we need fall into our life. It is a wonderful synchronicity that my brother has recently shared his healing miracle with me; it inspires me to let go of thoughts of cancer (knowing that I have made all the healthy life changes I could) and continue to focus on seeing myself whole, healed, and connected to the miraculous forces of the Universe. That’s the image and feeling I want to cultivate, nourish and nurture – That’s the intention I want to radiate out into the Universe.

I believe that the deepest intention of our soul is to be vibrantly present, whole and alive. I have experienced that seeming adversities such as aneurysms, depression and cancer can be valuable and necessary stimulants in bringing about that intention, resulting in the miracle of our full participation and appreciation of life and living our wildest dreams.

Do you have an intention that is bringing forth miracles in your life? Is there adversity in your life that is serving as “miracle grow” to help you flower into more vibrant aliveness and living your dream?

In Love,

Jan Jacobsen

P.S. - Speaking of miracles – Several weeks ago, my cat Zeena was given a 15% chance of survival by the vet who examined her, saying her jaundice and liver failure was too far advanced. I am thrilled to report that Zeena is alive and licking! No longer yellow, she is in the “pink”, and is purring beside me as I write this. Through the miracle of prayers, (yours and mine), lots of love and affection, and hand feeding her (having her lick Fancy Feast off my fingers), she made it! Thank you for all your loving thoughts and good wishes.



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